Parenting is not hardwork, it is HEART work!

The Bridge Forum turned out to be a huge success, afterall....(thank God for that!) despite all the fears i nurtured prior to the day. Apart for the fact that everything was in place and the crew giving their best.......,we had an awesome time and generally just had fun every step of the way!



It was very fulfilling for parents, guardian, teachers, youth worker and other participants to mingle with the teens (check out 'completed event' on the website to see participants comments). The height of it for me though was seeing how open they were to share their experiences on the use of technology and information thrown at them on the phone, in the movies etc. Some of them even had private discussions with the facilitators after their sessions were over, which futher emphasised the fact that teenagers may appear to be unapproachable or difficult to deal with most times but the truth is that they crave for guidance from the older generation.


'Parents/Guardians need to step up their game in parenting to the point that their kids can be free to discuss anything with them, that's what i will do with my kids'..... those were the words of Mr. Femi Oke, a speaker at the event. Feedback from the kids however indicated that their parents were not welcomed in some crucial aspect of their lives like the internet, relationships with the opposite sex etc. because of the fear of being judged. Another teenager wanted to know why their parents would not allow boys to visit even when they are aware they could meet in other places (putting Ace Actor Nobert Young on the spot).......and there were questions and questions......


And i have to agree that rather than dole out rules, we need to find a common ground to build a relationship around and then leverage on it to be able to guide them or teach them effectively.

The heart is where guilt is felt, where conviction happens, emotional issue are handled, relationships, love and trust is built...... so any parent/guardian who cares about making changes that will thrive needs to understand that no method works better than those of the heart. Which again leads us to knowing that we all dont have the same heart issue each time so there definitely cannot be a hard and fast rule when it comes to dealing with teenagers.

Wait, why do i feel that i say this all the time?........hmmm.....well, that's because it is the foundation that has to be laid. It is the BackDoor that will get us that beautiful relationship we long for in our teens and the trust and faith they in turn have in us to be able to share absolutely anything with us.


Cheers


Rotimi